Kalau saya buat hal lagi, tolong ingatkan saya bahawa saya yang terhegeh-hegeh dekat awak.

I don't really know how I'm feeling.

Sad? Dunno.

Anger? Maybe.

Vengeful? Man, I don't have time for that.

But, maybe it hurts when you made me accept you again but in the end it is still you who bailed. It's you who said, "I can't see where is this going". It's you who give up when I am ready to work this out again.

I'm willing to take the risk of getting you into my life again. I risked my heart being broken again. I tried. I tried hard. Still, you don't think it's enough, perhaps.

So, hey. Cheers to a new life. And this time, it's for real. No more you. Oh, please don't come back again.

*************

Me: Really, I don't understand why I can't meet a decent guy. And I don't even have requirements!
Amalil: Nope, you do.

Me: No way. I don't think so.
Amalil: You don't have physical requirements but you do have emotional requirements.

Me: Oh, wow. Yeah, I guess that's true.

Bird.

I'm seeing someone. Oh, wait. I think I was seeing someone.

We met at an event for work. He started to tease me a lot. Initially, I was irritated, but somehow I felt comfortable. I don't know why. And then the day ended. 

But I met you again. At another work function. Didn't expect to see you there but hey, you're there. You didn't see me so I just went to you and said hi. You looked surprised but I didn't think much of it. I thought maybe cause you've forgotten about me. Well, people are like that so no worries. And somehow you kinda stick with me that day. Oh, wait. You stick with me and my another friend. So I took a step back. Cause you looked like you're more comfortable with her rather than with me. Then again, the day ended. 

And I met you again. During work function too. You kept teasing me and I was kinda embarrassed. Well, my boss was there too. So, yeah. You asked for my number that night. And I gave it to you. 

And so the texting began. I'm pretty quiet and I don't text much. I don't converse much too except with close friends and family. But with you, I became chatty. And I didn't realize that I was flirting. Hey, I am not a flirt. Never. But with you, it became natural. 

And then you got sick. Well, you were sick before too but then you got worse. Then you're vanishing. 

I don't know if I like you. But I like spending time with you. You make me talk, one thing that I don't really enjoy and I enjoy talking to you. And it hurts when you're avoiding me. I know you're sick. But please, we're in this together, kan? 

Unless you don't want me to. 

*he calls me bird. Thus the title.